The powers of advertising on human beings is an overwhelmingly apt example of how fragile our minds are. Take this ad for Tom Ford cologne for example. That bottle is selling perfume/cologne. Now, obviously, I have no idea what the hell this shit smells like and if I had it my way there would be a scratch 'n sniff sticker on it. Anyway, back to the point, I have no idea what this shit smells like, nor do I care. All I know is that when I think of Tom Ford cologne/perfume ... I'm thinking about vagina. That's it. Game over.

Girls, you wonder why men are horny savages just trying to find a vagina to call home? It's because of ads like these that go and twist our minds. It's really not even fair. We are genetically inclined to ponder not what the cologne/perfume smells like but what does that object behind the bottle look like. Can you imagine the possibilities of what you could advertise with this picture? The possibilities are endless. I bet my far left eyelash on my right eye that you could put Save-On orange popsicles (the ones that always leave the paper sticking to them and taste like orange juice that has been left in a car for two weeks) in place of the cologne/perfume and men (and some women) everywhere would have freezers full of shitty popsicles. That my friend is a world I want to live in!

NEWS FLASH! Guess what people of America with a legal and up to date driving license; it is in the legal rights for a person to turn right on a red light. I'm just throwing that out there. I thought for sure people needed to know this when they took their written exam to obtain a drivers license. Who knows, maybe they didn't pay attention during that chapter for whatever reason, maybe they can't read.

I think I'm going to market little stickies that morons can buy that will stick to their dashboard saying and I quote, "Unless you're getting some serious road head, you can turn right on red." That way when they are sitting at a red light, texting, checking make up, eating fries, picking their nose, scratching their sack, having a conversation with Paul Harvey on the radio, making sure your NY hat is crooked enough to look tight, popping black heads, smelling your own brand, laughing to yourself about trim you just "Hit and Quit," or whatever people are doing that obstructs me from getting to point A to point B, they can look down, sound out the words, smack the palm of their hand on their forehead and say, "Dammit, I can turn right on red." Then with a smile, they can realize they just learned something today.

Hey, I'm all for bettering the world and if I can help someone a little more retarded than me then I can feel better about myself. Class dismissed.

Dear lovely ladies,

Some people write about themselves, some people write about worldly observations. I would say I'm a little in between. One observation that this guy (2 thumbs) has observed for roughly 6 months or so is this obsession for girls to not smile for pictures anymore. Oh no, heaven forbid somebody smiling for the camera and looking at least halfway hot is totally not cool, hip, or poppin' fresh anymore. Instead, they choose to do this weird half kissing half pouty looking face. On top of that they put a little title above their picture that says, "Mwwah!"